We’ve all been there. You pull into the parking lot, only to find every space taken. On its own, that wouldn’t be so bad. But when four of the spaces are taken by just one driver, it’s time to unleash hell. And if you’re anything like these 20 people, that means leaving the world’s most passive-aggressive note on the offending car’s windshield. If you’re struggling for inspiration for your own notes, however, you might want to check out these hilariously brutal takedowns of the world’s worst drivers.
This cunning driver has tapped in to the primal response of the guilty party by making him feel bad about ice cream. It doesn’t get much more brutal than that. After all, can you imagine parking so badly that someone’s ice cream melted because of you? We’re pretty sure we’d never sleep again.
Whoever’s behind this burn is so used to dishing them out that they’ve had it professionally printed on a card. Well, we suppose it’s more efficient. And though it lacks the emotional rage of a handwritten note, it’s hard to argue with the imagery it conjures up.
Just in case the actual request wasn’t insulting enough, this exasperated driver has even included the tools needed for the recipient to carry out their instructions. Imagine coming back to your car to find this on your windshield. Indeed, if it were us, we’d probably never show our face – or car – there again.
The amount of time and effort put into this elaborate diagram might seem unnecessary to some people. And yet, if you’ve ever encountered someone who insists on parking like this, you’ll know exactly why it’s needed. The patronizing tone is just the icing on the cake for this deliciously passive-aggressive note.
Ouch. It doesn’t get much harsher than this. But when bad parking is involved, it’s totally understandable. It helps that it’s also hilarious, of course. In fact, we probably wouldn’t mind receiving something as witty as this – especially printed onto such an awesome card.
“May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits” may well be the greatest slur we’ve ever heard. And that’s saying something, coming at the end of a letter that’s packed with outrageously brutal analogies and insults. That it’s topped off with the sender’s compliments is a perfect finale.
You know you’ve triggered someone’s pet peeve when they give you a stock business card in response. Indeed, whoever’s behind this slice of brilliance has clearly encountered enough bad drivers to make printing the cards worth their while. So if you find yourself receiving one, you might well need to rethink your parking strategy.
That took an unexpected turn. Then again, we think we almost prefer this version. Someone call Carly Rae Jepsen – we all have her number by now, after all – because it’s time for a remix. A hilariously ruthless remix, that is.
It doesn’t get much more passive-aggressive than this. Indeed, you can almost imagine whoever wrote it smiling sweetly while speaking through gritted teeth. With a crazy glint in their eye at the same time, of course. The “hate you” sign-off just seals the deal.
This hilarious note is absolutely savage, from Mickey flipping the bird to the recommendation to take public transport in future. And that’s not even mentioning the request for a can opener. It just works on so many levels, each more unforgiving than the last.
As burns go, this is up there with the toastiest. In fact, we’re surprised this useless driver’s car hasn’t already burst into flames. The best insults are always the most elaborate, after all – and it doesn’t get much more inventive than this.
Okay, maybe we were wrong about that last one. This is the true pinnacle of elaborate bad driver burns. Indeed, anyone who receives this merciless flyer will probably feel pretty humiliated. And it’s therefore much more likely to actually do its job.
Sometimes, however, it’s the simple notes that are most effective. This particular number gets straight to the point, without beating around the bush. Moreover, the minimum effort required by the annoyed party makes for a win-win all round. Well, except for whoever was foolish enough to park so badly, that is.
Yikes. Bringing in the death of your grandmother might be a little extreme, but if it gets the message across, who’s to say it isn’t worth it? Well, most reasonable people, probably. But it’s just so difficult to get bad drivers to empathize with you…
Well, they’re not wrong. Plus, the perpetrator of the parking crime at least gets to enjoy all that peanut butter. As long as they don’t mind eating it off the windshield, that is. And as wild as this act of revenge is, the smaller paper note suggests the fed-up driver isn’t so hostile after all.
Whoever was behind this must have been really, really cheesed off. After all, they went to the effort of carving out an entire clan of potato people to enact their terrifying revenge. We know we wouldn’t want to come across these guys in a dark alleyway…
There’s nothing like a ridiculously detailed breakdown to make someone realize they can’t park for love nor money. The author has even included a diagram to further illustrate their point. Indeed, we’re pretty sure they’ve basically earned the title of “passive-aggressive king” with this note.
When he isn’t fighting crime or teaming up with the Avengers to save the world, Spider-Man spends his time cracking down on bad drivers. At least according to this note, anyway. We can’t help but feel like the actual web-slinger might have better things to do, but hey, who are we to question the authority of a windshield note?
Any note that starts “Dear motherfu…” is going to be pretty brutal. But somehow, this merciless note just gets worse as it goes on. Clearly, its author really just couldn’t take it anymore. Indeed, you have to wonder how many bad drivers they’d seen for it to get to this point…
Imagine if Liam Neeson actually did start clamping down on bad drivers. It might not make for a great Taken sequel, but you can be sure it’d be an effective way to get people to start parking better. Until then, this ruthless, hilarious note is basically the next best thing.